A nice man cometh…

The regular wafflings of a 30-Something Scotsman.

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(Un)funny Topical jokes (reader beware)

Posted by Stephen on December 16, 2006

Seems like everyone is bouncing these jokes around at the moment. Since they’re living in my phone at the moment, I thought I’d gather them all here. Comments are welcome. I remain tactfully impartial…(ahem):-

  • Police are urging people in ipswich who want sex before xmas to hurry …while stocks last!
  • Just bought my ex-wife’s Xmas prezzies. Black boots, fishnets, wee leather skirt, low cut top and a one-way ticket to Ipswich!
  • You think it’s cold here? It’s minus 5 in Ipswich!
  • Job ad:- Ipswich area, prostitutes required. Great rates of pay, but the shifts are murder!
  • Sutcliffe – 6 years, 13 girls. New bloke 5 girls, 2 weeks… You can’t get quicker than an Ipswich Ripper!
  • What do a dyslexic santa and the ipswich killer have in common?
    they both keep leaving prozzies under the tree.
  • Whats the difference between mr kipling and the ipswich killer?
    Mr kipling puts 6 tarts in a box.
  • There is now no rugby in Ipswich due to lack of hookers
  • The Ipswich game is off on Sunday. A dyslexic serial killer has murdered all the substitutes!
  • Ipswich morgue…Mortician 1 – “Of course it is the season for it”Mortician 2 – “What do you mean?”

    Mortician 1 (pointing to the corpses) – “Well. Ho, ho, ho”

  • They caught the Ipswich murderer. Asked him if he wanted a piece of Christmas cake with his tea. He said “No but i could murder a tart”

8 Responses to “(Un)funny Topical jokes (reader beware)”

  1. nagaijin said

    Impartial my arse. You pass shite like this around because you find it funny. Why would you post it otherwise? Shall we try a bit of honesty here?

  2. Stephen said

    Honesty? Ok, the jokes are funny. The reality isn’t. It’s the same with anything newsworthy on such a scale (Space Shuttle disaster, 9/11, etc..). People can either take the view that its distasteful or not, but I’d like to think that the average Joe can see the difference between the reality of a situation and still retain the ability to appreciate humour in the context it’s given. Obviously, no-one means any direct harm or offence to the people affected, and if I was ever involved in something as tragic as this and it was in the public domain, I’d fully expect (but not ‘like’) there to be jokes from it.

    Incidentally, and for whatever difference it may make, none of these jokes are my own – they just arrived on my phone from various other people – who got them from others etc…(scattered around the web too I see). If you’re gonna blame someone, blame the person thinkin them up. It’d be a sad state of affairs if society punished you for laughing at something which someone else found in bad taste…

    (Only an opinion).

  3. nagaijin said

    Well that’s better.

  4. craiga said

    Nobody finds the reality funny but the jokes are.
    nobody telling the jokes is committing a crime. People should punish those who commit a crime in society as far as im concerned if you,work pay taxes and are a decent person you are alowed to laugh.
    lets cut crime and not laughs

  5. craiga said

    but yes people have a point it really isnt funny. now i feel the cops are on my trail every time i try and pick up a hooker.

  6. ntz said

    THESE JOKES ARE SAD BUT REALLY FUNNY! HAVE A SENCE OF HUMOUR PEOPLE

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